Janey Godley’s Blog

Ashley had a bit of a crush on him and with him being single it all looked lovely. I immediately had reservations as I don’t want my daughter dating a ‘comic’ I know that’s wrong but in this industry we ‘comics’ are not the best people to be involved in as we tend to be fucked up self obsessed nutters.

(I know- I am one of those).

Anyway, she was a bit smitten and she and he had lots of time of flirting and getting on, though I must point out that nothing actually went on between them.

I spoke to him and told him I didn’t like him showing any interest as I don’t want her getting involved with someone on the other side of the world as we would be leaving NZ soon and as my daughter has NEVER had any relationship I didn’t want her heart being broken by some guy who saw her as a holiday romance. He agreed and was nice about this and I respect that.

So they both agreed to keep it friendly though Ashley was courting a huge crush on him, and that was lovely to watch and hard on me as I am a mother and I would rather poke out my own eyes that watch her being hurt. I know she has to go through pain sometimes and there is only so much I can do without being interfering so I shut up….though I did at one point tell him if he hurt her emotionally I would actually stick an axe in his forehead and I pointed out on his head with my index finger where that axe would go!

So….he finally came to Edinburgh as he has been in the UK working as a comic for a few weeks. I was pleased to see him and Ashley was excited and as high as a kite! They both went out the other night as he only had three days in Scotland before going off again to do comedy somewhere else.

He arrived and promptly got very drunk and Ashley went back to his place. She was so excited and so she should be, she was totally smitten kittens with this guy and she has waited ages for him to get here and finally kiss.

They had a bit of a snog and Ashley was annoyed as he was very drunk and she decided she would not sleep with him as she didn’t want to have to remind him in the morning what they had done, and as she is very moral about her personal sexual choices (fuck knows where she got that from?) she didn’t want to feel as though she had ‘raped’ him and surely if this was their first time the very least he could do was remember the event that would be so important to her? (I may not have done much right in my life, but my daughter is a fucking star as far as I am concerned, she will never fuck a man for a hug that’s for sure!).

So the next night when they met up he then told her he had a girlfriend back in NZ. Ashley was shattered, she was so angry that he had led her on and he had months to tell her he was involved with a girl, they had kissed and been quite intimate, she was fuming and felt so stupid she sat and cried.

I then was about to get the cunt killed, I could press one number on speed dial and he would be history, but I know violence will not solve this.

So he was leaving Edinburgh last night and she refused to go along to the party and say goodbye to him. I urged her to go and at least get closure, she refused. She told me she had said all she needed to say and now sits wondering if all men are liars and doubts her own self worth, so I am now sharpening an axe again…

I am proud of her, she never compromised herself, he on the other hand came to Edinburgh, the BIGGEST COMEDY festival in the WORLD…he never got a gig, he never went to meet any promoters, he never used his valuable time to make himself known to people who would be important to his career here in UK….he got drunk.

Ashley on the other hand managed to do her show and go back to Glasgow to do an exam at Uni….so Cori, if you are reading this…. THANKS….I never did have to axe you, you managed to fuck it up yourself and I hope you get your career up and running, I hope you sort yourself out, I do hope you meet a woman who stands by you and you love her with all your life and I hope more than anything you stop drinking yourself into oblivion. You are someone’s son, I am sure your parents are proud of you, but not as much as I am proud of my child today. I am rooting for you Cori, I know there is a good soul in there waiting to be found and fixed, I am just glad it’s not my daughter who takes on that project.

Be-safe but more than that be-ware…..me.

PS- Yes Cori, this did go on my blog, all 120 sites that get over 10,000 hits a day, journalists, bloggers and people from all over the world will have read this….so look…you are famous after all!

On a lighter note, Ashley and I had great fun on Bruce Devlin’s daily show at The Stand comedy club. It was a chat show thing and was really nice, Bruce is a good host.